1. The “hedge of protection”
This one is
pretty common, but it still bothers me and I can’t really say why. Maybe it’s because I can’t seem to find a
Bible verse to support it. Maybe it’s because
I associate the word “hedge” with the movie Over the Hedge and I can’t take it
seriously. Maybe it’s because if I only
have a simple hedge protecting me, I actually feel kind of exposed and vulnerable
and semi-defenseless. Stand back, fiend! I have a hedge of protection around me! How do you like me NOW?! Don’t get me
wrong, I know it’s like a Jesus hedge so it’s probably bullet proof and all
that. Really, I love that people pray
this over me. If someone prays this over
you, it’s like exchanging spiritual BFF necklaces. It’s like part of the Christian code, I
think. Still. I don’t come out of that prayer feeling very…
protected. By a hedge. A hedge.
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| Over the Hedge.... OF PROTECTION. |
2. Prayers about my future spouse
Oooookay. Can you see me rolling my eyes? I feel very strongly about this one. If God is going to bring a man into my life, can
we just leave that up to Him please? Are
the details (the time, place, etc.) really that relevant to this prayer? Truth:
I feel more uncomfortable about myself when you pray this prayer over
me. Do you think I’m somehow incomplete
because I don’t have that “special someone” in my life (yet)? What if it’s God’s will that I don’t get
married? Consider that. And how about instead of praying over my
future spouse’s purity, you pray about my
purity? And instead of praying that he
is a “strong man of God,” you pray that I
become a strong woman of God? The friend or family member that prays this
prayer obviously means well; however, if they insist on praying over my future
spouse, I would much prefer they do that in private and not in front of
me.
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| Thanks, David Crowder Band. |
3. Saying “I’ll pray for you!” or “I’ll be praying for
you!” all the time.
So this isn’t
actually a prayer, but it’s close enough.
Why do people insist that they will pray for you, especially in a church
setting, but they don’t actually just stop what they’re doing and pray right
then and there? It’s a little hypocritical
of me to point this out because I don’t always do this, but I figure it’s worth
mentioning. I am trying to make an
effort to just stop and pray with people instead of saying, “Oh, I’ll
definitely be praying for you” only to end up forgetting that person even
exists. Think of how awesome it would be
if someone just said to you in public “Can I pray for you? Like, right now?” or “Let’s pray together” instead of just the
usual “I’ll pray for you this week!” For
the few times this has happened to me, the love of Christ is SO OBVIOUS. Think of how many people need this
encouragement! So many people need to
know that God’s people DO care. And,
although praying in a public or semi-public place may seem scary, it will strengthen
your faith exponentially.
4. The “just”
Have you ever
been distracted when someone is praying because you are counting the number of
times they say “just”? Lord, just be in this place tonight. Just let us feel your presence right
now. Clear our minds and just let us
focus our hearts on You. Just make our
hearts right for worship. Just. JUST.
Not everyone is a just-er. Some
people like to repeat the word “and” which makes for very interesting, lengthy,
run-on sentence prayers. Some people repeat
God’s name a bunch of times, which is cool I guess because He’s got one heck of
a powerful name, but I’d be cautious of over-using God’s name, even in
prayer. Anyway, let’s learn not to pray
like broken records.
5. Food Prayers
There’s not a
lot that goes on during a prayer before a meal.
God bless this meal and the hands
that prepared it. Amen. OR you might be lucky enough to have one of
those parents that looooves to drag out the meal prayer (just to make you
salivate and die of hunger, probably). And
if you do, your dilemma is great: You
want to be a good Christian and focus on praying right along with your
exceptionally righteous and apparently not hungry parent, but the whole time
all you can think is FOOD OHMIGOSH
FOOD. How do I know about this? Because it happens to me all. The. Time. So this is my public apology for being rude
and unspiritual. I propose a compromise –
How about I work on self-control some more, and
we pray before the food is on the table in front of me…?
6. Praying and then doing absolutely nothing else
Okay, another
thing I’m guilty of: praying and then being
idle. In the church, we like to call
this “leaving it in God’s hands” or “surrendering it to God.” I like to call it bullcrap. Here’s the thing I’ve learned over the past
21 years: faith is useless if not
supported by action. It’s the old
protestant versus catholic debate – what saves you? Faith alone or good works? Well,
I do believe that faith alone is the basis of my salvation. #protestantreformation . However, this is NOT an excuse to sit around
and do nothing. You don’t just pray, you
take action. That means different things
in different situations, but it’s just a general idea that seems to have been
forgotten. Not to burst anyone’s bubble,
but *God is not a wish-granting factory.*
Honestly, I could
go on and on about this topic. But you know
what? I’m guilty of almost every
annoying prayer habit I can come up with.
So I’m going to work on not being a hypocrite AND not praying like a
lousy, annoying Christian. And you are most
welcome to join me in these endeavors.
