I feel dry. 


I wish I could play piano, I wish I could sing so loud and so long that my lungs burn. I wish I could paint something.

This is frustrating. 

I need a creative outlet. Writing is not helping right now.

Mood

Mad Girl's Love Song - S. Plath

I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead; 
I lift my lids and all is born again. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.) 

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red, 
And arbitrary blackness gallops in: 
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. 

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed 
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.) 

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade: 
Exit seraphim and Satan's men: 
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. 

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed 
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.) 

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade: 
Exit seraphim and Satan's men: 
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. 

I fancied you'd return the way you said, 
But I grow old and I forget your name. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.) 

I should have loved a thunderbird instead; 
At least when spring comes they roar back again. 
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. 
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

And if you're still breathing, you're the lucky ones.
'Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs.
Setting fire to our insides for fun
Collecting names of the lovers that went wrong
The lovers that went wrong.

Treasures

Yesterday, Lexi and I went on a shopping excursion in downtown Geneva.  We rooted through resale shops, boutiques, and antique stores all afternoon.  It was such a blessing to escape from the chaotic and hateful environment at home and just laugh with my best friend. She loves me in spite of my messy problems.  She always speaks life and truth into my being. I need that positivism in my life right now. I need it more than anything.  

I am going to enjoy my last two months in the States and nobody is going to stop me.

Definitely wanted to purchase this beauty! 

This reminded me of my grandma's house

Jars of knick knacks and trinkets

A beautiful old organ we discovered in the antique shop

This is the fun Mexican cantina where we ate after our shopping adventure!

These are the days that must happen to you

breathe in chaos
breathe out peace

breathe in bitterness
breathe out blessings

breathe in despair
breathe out hope

breathe in indifference
breathe out love

breathe in heartache
breathe out strength

breathe in loneliness
breathe out healing

Sweet Summertime

Yesterday, Lexi and I went to Centennial Beach in Naperville.  We had a blast together! Every moment I spend with her, I'm reminded of all that we've been through together, and how constant she has been through all of my shit.  I couldn't have asked for a better best friend.  What would I do without this beautiful soul?  She is gorgeous inside and out.  I sincerely thank God for my lovely, caring, wise friend.

Here are some fun photos that were taken after we returned home from the beach...

Mood:

*Judge me*

This is SO. COOL.

I'm currently doing a fun little project for a creative writing class.  There is this site called 750 Words, which is basically a private online journal that prompts you to write at least 750 words every day.  I absolutely love this thing.  The coolest part? It logs all of your data in a section called "Metadata."  It shares things like "Most Commonly Used Words" or "Issues You Are Most Concerned About."

I obviously won't share any of my entries because the entire point is that it's a private journal (unlike a blog or other website).  But here are some images that reveal a lot about what I'm most preoccupied with when I write creatively.  So neat!